Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A Difference in Perspective

Yesterday, Lithus was on the phone with a friend and former colleague when I heard him say "Actually, we're homeless right now..." and it drew me up short. Over the last two weeks, he had made some comments about the economy and what it is doing to the private aviation industry. While I had heard him, they hadn't really registered. When he finished the conversation, I asked him about it.

Sure enough, he sees us as homeless. He sees this as something that has been more or less forced on us by the demise of Old Company. It's a very interesting perspective. And very different from mine.

What's been forced? Does he have a job that could pay for a home for us? Yep. Am I slowly beginning to build a name for myself that will start paying off in another year or so? Yep. Did we sit down and decide to live this way? Yep, sure did. After all, why pay rent on an apartment that we rarely occupy? All of which, in my world, makes us not homeless but living on the road. At least in my mind.

It's different for him, apparently. Apparently, for him, since we wouldn't have chosen this had O.C. not gone under then it is forced. And that part I do understand. But we could've chosen to stay in our apartment and be apart more often than not (neither one of us *would* have chosen this, but we *could* have chosen this). We could've decided to get a smaller, less expensive place as a homebase of sorts (which we are looking at more seriously, as we are learning Lithus misses having a homebase). However, we looked at those options and decided against them. We chose.

So, I remind myself his feelings are his feelings, even if I don't understand them or understand how he arrived at them. As a sociological observation, though, I'm intrigued. Two people. The same situation. The same discussions. Such very different perspectives.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.


Aisha T. said...

I remember telling one of my friends that "I didn't have a choice" and she pointed out that there is always a choice. The options given just might not be so appealing. Seeing the points of view differ so widely is fascinating. Of course, I am an outside observer looking in and not experiencing.

Hermes said...

Falling in Love was discovered in Prince George BC, Pine Center Mall, Cole's Bookstar (associated with Chapters in Canada). Does that make you an international author? I think so. International citizens have a home anywhere. Wherever you lay your hat, right?

2 Dollar Productions said...

That is interesting, and I can actually see both sides of the equation. But I think you nailed it with the choice issue as it was a choice that you made together (and seems to make the most sense given the situation). But I think that looking at the same situation from different perspectives and talking through it is one of the better parts of being with someone you care about since knowing where the other person is coming from is vitally important to being around them for the long term.

BostonPobble said...

Aisha T ~ Need I say that I have been a there-are-always-choices person for a very long time, now? Still, it was fascinating to me to observe it all, too. Glad to see you around. You've been missed.

GOML! ~ HOLY SHIT!!!!! Are you serious?????? Okay, yeah, I know you are because you wouldn't lie to me, of course, but still...HOLY SHIT! You just made my day. Does this mean I can now claim to be a world-renowned author?

$$ ~ You got it in one. As intrigued as I was/am (and as much as I obviously agree with you about the subtext of our decision), I am also grateful to know where his head is with this.

Hermes said...

I'm on chapter 4.