Thursday, January 31, 2013


Anyone who knows me know that domestic violence is My Big Issue. Both my sisters have been in abusive relationships (although neither are now, TTG) and that informed my life in a big way. While they may have gotten me into the domestic violence field, it became my cause because of and during working in the field for 13 years. Was a time I was a sought-after domestic violence trainer, both for victims and case managers.

All of which leads up to...

What the fuck is this shit?

First, it's a game, filed under "romance games" by the way, with a description that reads: Train your guy. Click on him to hit him when he does anything wrong. Yes, you read that right: "hit him when he does anything wrong."

Then, there's the app, in which you can slap, strangle, mace and electrocute your fella for doing unconscionable things like looking at other women and drinking your drink. And in case you are wondering, the app is rated appropriate for ages four and up. Lovely.

Now, the argument can be made that women have been treated like shit for so long, and are so often the victims of domestic violence, that it is unfair to expect us to not retaliate. To that, I call bullshit. This isn't about me saying women should be the better people. Oh hell no. A man beats you, woman, and you get the chance, do what you have to do. From kicking him out on Christmas Eve into a raging snow storm to sending him to the hospital for all the times he sent you, I will not talk you down. Again, you do what you have to do. You look at men with the hairy eyeball for the rest of your life, I'm good with that and get it. 

That's not what is happening here.

What's happening here is the continuation of a culture of violence that says we can treat our partners worse than we treat strangers on the street. Worse than we treat our pets. That our partners are only worthy when they do what we want, how we want, when we want. At best, it's a double standard. At worst, it perpetuates a culture that does indeed damage all of us.

All of which is an intellectual way of saying What The Fuck Is This Shit?

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.


Anonymous said...

Yes, pretty grotesque. There's just too much of this crap around though. If I paid attention to it I would be exhausted.


Murr Brewster said...

Gee, but she's cute and curvy and it all looks so cool.