I've been somewhat introspective this week. Nothing major and certainly not bad. Just turned inward. It has led to some interesting thinkings and the Sunday Poll Question...
Question: What quality is important to how you live your life?
Pobble Answer: Integrity. This comes from my father and grandfather. They were old school and taught me my name and my word means something. While no one can take it away from me, they taught, I can make it worthless. A handshake was as good as a signed contract. Seriously. That has stuck with me. Am I perfect? Hell no. Do I try? Every day, in little ways and big ones. Professionally, I cannot live the me first and screw everybody else attitude. Personally, I cannot assure someone something and then not follow through. I hate when people do not know where they stand with me because I have been less than honest. Even spiritually, I have been asked to mess with people's lives and won't do it. I have been asked if I have cast love spells on people. The answer is no. Behaving that way is living without integrity. I goes against my grain and everything I hold dear. Hell, I don't cheat on my taxes; if a cashier gives me too much change, I give it back; and everything on my resume is both true AND accurate. And when I fail to do something, be it my fault or life's, I own it, apologize and accept the consequences. Without excuses. Again, am I perfect? No where close. I do try though. I try very, very hard because integrity is that important to me. Because my name means something to me and I refuse to make it worthless.
Your answer...
Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.
18 comments:
This is kind of a hard one for me, because my first thought was the same as yours - integrity. But I think there's more to it for me and I'm gonna go with - Honesty.
Of course I mean that in terms of not accepting anything but honesty from other people, and giving that in return. But it also means being honest with myself, about the things which I really need most. It's also offering what I have as a human being as honestly as possible. I think to be less than honest with yourself is what true failure is. If the thing you really want most in life is to be an auto mechanic, but you go to law school 'cause your family expected it, are you truly successful? In a financial sense, perhaps. But you've failed yourself miserably by not living your life honestly and doing that which you're most passionate about.
I gave up "the life" I used to have, on the road all the time, performing. I couldn't understand why I was so miserable and stressed out when I was doing the thing I loved. Hmmm. So, I thought that meant I needed to do something else, which is why I got a Master's in special education. After 5 years in a classroom, I realized I'd rather live in my car than do that again. That left me with some real soul seaching to do. What I realized is that all I ever honestly wanted was to sing for a living. The performing was great, but that wasn't what I wanted at the core of it. I just love to sing. What I do now fulfills that on every level 'cause I teach, do small gigs, do voice over work and get to be at home for my family. All the integrity in the world wouldn't have gotten me here. I had to be honest so I could truly follow my passion. When you do that, the money will come. I believe that completely.
I also want to add that in my heart, it was a matter of stopping to honestly listen to what God was telling me. I'd only heard parts of it before and found myself miserable. He doesn't want us to be miserable, but we do have to listen to understand where we need to be.
Jaded ~ I write all of my posts long-hand before transcribing them here. This morning, I wrote two: one on integrity; one on honesty. And then had to choose. It was a close, close thing, for many of the reasons you pointed out here. So, thanks for adding my other answer. ;) Why am I not surprised these were your two answers as well?
This might be redundant as Honesty and Integrity might be pretty much the same thing as Intention.
And I do not know if Intention is even a quality. To me, nothing is more important than intentions. If I've been wronged, or think I've been wronged - it can all be tempered with good intentions gone wrong. If I find out the person MEANT for me to be hurt, it's so much more painful than the actual thing.
I know that becasue I'm just not very good at interpersonal relationships, I've spent a lot of my time explaining that I never meant for things to turn the way they did (if it went bad).
But to know intentions, you have to have honesty. Because intentions can't be known unless someone tells you - or it is your own intentions you are looking at.
Zooom ~ The joy of the Sunday Poll Question is there's not a right answer so who cares if it's redundant (although I don't think it is); who cares if it's a quality or not (although, the way you describe it, I think it is); it's your answer, it's on topic, it's ALL GOOD. We're very laid back here at Pobble Thoughts, in case you hadn't noticed. ;) And may I say that I LOVE that you are blogging more often again. You are always So Missed when you're on hiatus!
I'll try talking about "Thoughfulness" ... yes, generalizing on something that can mean so many different things ... but that's why I picked it ... let's go over a few of my meanings :)
Thoughtfulness can cover thinking about what you are about to say before you say it ... thoughfulness can be remembering someone's birthday in September before it rolls around in October and *finally* doing something for it ;)
Thoughtfulness can be considering the consequences before choosing between two lesser evils ... thoughtfulness can be meditating on what makes you happy and can mesh with the world around you ...
Thoughtfulness can be not throwing that cigarette butt out the window as you sit in traffic ... thoughtfulness can be picking up that cigarette butt and handing it back to the driver since obviously he didn't *mean* to toss it on the ground, his fingers just slipped ...
I still applaud INTEGRITY and HONESTY and INTENTIONS ... it's a really tough poll question there and choosing between any of these answers would easily cause a race condition in my brain and eventual core dump ...
true happiness. not the kind of happy when you are laughing and having fun all the time, but the kind of happy that rings peace. it's when i choose to to the hard thing, because i know it's the thing that will be best and eventually bring about a sense that life is the way it should be.
i hope that makes sense. i made a lithus rum and coke... and it was a little heavy on the rum.
SFTB ~ Thoughtfulness is good. I can see why it's important to you.
Lovely Cats ~ Makes perfect sense. And it being a little heavy on the rum is implicit in it being a Lithus rum and coke. He would be honored, I'm sure!
I'm one to say what I mean and mean what I say. I take complete responsibility for my action and words. I am a giver and have a hard time accepting generosity from others but I am the first one in line to give and I do not want a thank you.
I am not perfect and have made many a mistakes, but I have learned the hard way and I only say something about a person if I am will to say it to their face.
I am proud to say my kids have adopted a few of these qualities and I hope they continue to grow and become strong and sensitive people.
This one made me think.
Hi Pobble
Perseverance - Never give in, never give up, never surrender. No matter what life throws at you. When it knocks you down, rise back up, again and again and again, until you simply cannot rise up one more time, and when you cannot rise up one more time and are eventually beaten (as we all eventually must be) Let it know that you may have been beaten but you were never defeated...
Nancy ~ Say what you mean, mean what you say. Excellent. And if you can get to the place where you can accept help occasionally, even better. ;)
Dagoth ~ "You may have been beaten but were never defeated." That one brought tears to my eyes.
I have no idea. I'll get back to ya.
I totally would go with the integrity thing because I too was raised like that and it's overlapped into my way of living. But, for the sake of diversity, I'll go ahead and give another answer. (I haven't read the comments so that I won't be influenced before I answer for myself.)
One quality that is important to how I live my life is being committed to my friendships. Being there for my friends and family as best as I possibly can. Doing anything with in my power for them in times of need and in every day life. One of the hardest things about moving out west for me was being unable to comfort, nurture and support those dearest to me when they needed it, because I was clear across the country and couldn't put my arms around them and hold them while they cried. And as my life changes and I'll have more friends dispersed across the globe, I have to find new ways to be the kind of friend that I am, despite the distance.
I would do ANYTHING in my power for a friend in need, and as nice as thins sounds, some times I forget that other people do things differently than I do and to remember to cut them some slack, because just because they aren't being the kind of friend that I would be doesn't mean that they don't love me, they just do it differently. And at the same time, I also know what I need and if someone isn't willing to give me wheat I need they probably aren't the kind of friend that I'm ogin to want to depend upon.
I like bouts of introspection, and this is a good question. I also think your answer was excellent.
My guiding principles would be to tell the truth, do what you say you will do and dedicate time to the people who are important to you.
It is hard to sum up one's values into a single word. It takes kind of a Taoist approach. Stop thinking about it and the answer is there. For me, determination. Like Dagoth, surrender is simply not an option. Victory or death in all things: work, life and love. It's not as harsh as it sounds, it just means that you need to make your choices and see them through despite obstacles. If you don't, your choices make you.
Traci ~ I'll be here. ;)
Graziella ~ And you succeed at being a good friend.
$$ ~ Tell the truth, do what you say and make time for those who are important...yeah, these work for me, too.
GOML! ~ Determination doesn't sound harsh at all, no matter how you phrase it. Because you're right, otherwise the decision makes itself for you.
I've thought and thought and I guess I'd have to say Genuine-ness. I have no idea if it's really even a word however I do know that most people who know me for very long use it to describe me.
I'm not fake or phony. I don't blow smoke up anyone's ass. I'm honest. I work hard 'cept when I don't. I care about people and blah, blah, blah...
There ya have it. Me in a nutshell.
If our beloved president were to read this blog entry, he would have absolutely NO idea what you were talking about.
I'm right there with ya, sister.
I think I'll go with honesty because if you are as honest as possible and real with your feelings and with poeple, your name will ring with integrity. I want my word to stand for something. It is my bond. I try to always be honest about everything I do and say.
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