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Sunday, September 11, 2011

September 11th, Every Year

Every year on September 11th, I call the Grill Master. If you were to ask either of us, I'm not sure we could tell you why it is important for us to check in with each other this day; we only both know it is. In 2001, we weren't together; we didn't talk; we didn't catch up. The Divine M (his wife and my best friend, for those of you who are new-er here) and I spent many hours on the phone that day, but he and I didn't. And yet....

One year, on the anniversary, I was there, quite by accident. He and I spent the day quietly together. "In prayer and reflection" isn't a phrase that will ever be used for us, but it was as close to that as we will ever get. We didn't talk much but we didn't leave the room without the other often or for long, either. The shoulder clap and the eye contact-nod was common throughout the day. It was vintage Pobble-Grill Master and it felt right. It felt right enough that the next couple years, I was there on the anniversary intentionally. Somewhere during those years, it became important for us to check in when I couldn't be there.

This year was no different. It went like this:

Him: Hello, Boston.
Me: Hello, Grill Master. How the hell are you?
Him: As good as I can be. How you doing?
Me: 'Bout the same.
Him: Yeah. Where are you now? Idaho? Iowa?
Me: We're in Idaho. What the fuck am I doing in Idaho?
Him: Calling me, 'cause it's September 11th. That's what you're doing in Idaho.
Me: *sighs* Yeah. You know I love you, right?
Him: Ditto.
Me: I know.
Him: Yeah.
Me: Yeah.
Him (sadder): Yeah.
Me (sadder): Yeah.
Both: *sigh*
Me: You take care.
Him: Go, have as good a day as you can.
Me: You, too. And if I don't talk to you before, I'll talk to you in a year.
Him (laughing): Yeah!
Me: (laughing): Talk to you later.
Him: Later.

That was it. That was enough. We both said everything we needed to say and heard everything we didn't need to speak.

And that's why I love him and why I acknowledge this day with him, wherever I am.


Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

3 comments:

Bill Dameron said...

very sweet and sad.

Gay Soldier's Husband said...

This made me smile, but - as Bill said - a sad, sweet smile.

Rose said...

Wow!