I'm Sorry

If you don't know the true meaning and power of the words "I'm Sorry" then may I suggest you go and read Bartholomew Cubbins and the Oobleck by Dr. Seuss. It is, as most of his work is, inspiring, enlightening while being good rolicking fun. Truly the man was a genius.

Sadly, most people it seems have forgotten the true meaning of the words "I'm Sorry." We have become an apologetic nation. And think that will make it all okay.

The other night, I was instant messaging with a friend. We were both frustrated, tired and bless her heart, she was getting sick, too. At one point, she said something uncalled for. Before I could even respond, she had apologized, acknowledging it was uncalled for. In fact "uncalled for" is her phrase. This is a real apology. This is one I knew was sincere. Every single one of us has said something uncalled for, stupid, hurtful, untrue...whatever at some point. When that happens, the best you can do is apologize, hope the other person accepts and move on. The key is apologizing.

When is the key not apologizing? When your true thoughts and feelings came out. When you are neglectful enough of other people that you think you can say anything. When you are more sorry you got caught than for what you said. When you aren't planning on changing your attitude or actions. When you aren't really sorry, dammit.

When someone says something about another person's race, gender, orientation, weight, religion...those are not mis-speaks. Those are that person's actual and real feelings. Don't call your fellow actor a "fa**ot" and then apologize the next day. Don't make a drunken rant about Jews or throw around the "n-word" and then apologize the next day. If you don't truly feel those things somewhere down deep inside of you, it doesn't even dawn on you to use the words in the first place. I had given myself permission to spell out "fa**ot" and the "n-word" in this blog in order to make my point ~ and I cannot do it. Not out of any sense of political correctness. Not even because I might offend someone. Just because those words are so offensive and because they are simple so wrong.

Yet I'm supposed to believe you have had an epiphany in 24 hours???? You haven't had time to think about it. You haven't had time to learn why what you said was wrong and hurtful. You haven't had time to change whatever is inside of you that made you say those things in the first place. You're only sorry because society tells you that you should be sorry. And I can't respect that. I actually had more respect for Tim Hardaway before his apology than after it. What he said repulsed and disgusted me ~ and at least he had the backbone to say what he truly believed, however reprehensible. Until he apologized.

We can apologize for two things: our intentions and our impacts. I just don't believe that these people who have been spewing such vituperation are sorry for either. They only seem to be sorry they got caught or that they are having to pay consequences.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.