One More Goodbye

I am officially single. Didn't get to tell him until today but it happened last night at midnight or so. Let's get one thing straight, first: I'm a demanding bitch. However, I am also a very fair demanding bitch. I do not expect people to read my mind. I spell out what my expectations are very clearly. There are two things that send me into very dark places ~ being ignored and being left hanging. I make no bones about these two things and, even so, give a guy a couple chances to get it.

Last night, my fella and I hadn't seen each other in a couple days 'cause The Lovely Cats and Princess Kitten were in town. He called and we agreed he would be over about 9-ish. At 9, he called and said he wanted to go out with the guys. NO PROBLEM. I asked if I would see him at all that evening and he said yes. 10:15-ish. No later than 10:30 because his buddy had a 10 o'clock train back to the 'burbs. So, I took a bath in our favorite scent and settled in with a good book to wait for him.

At 11:30, refusing to go into my dark place, I went to bed. At midnight, he called. Still out with the guys. ~ sigh ~ I told him to go home when he was done.

At two in the morning, my phone rang. His buddy, drunk. And it rang again at 2:03. His buddy, drunk. And again at 2:05. I finally took the phone into the living room which is a good thing because my caller i.d. shows that my phone rang again at 3:10 and 3:13.

When we talked today, he thought I was breaking up with him because of the drunk dial. Now, admittedly, Alan did him no favors. But that's not why I ended it. I'm not THAT much of a bitch. Partly, I ended it because of the hour and a half lag time between the time he said he would be here "at the latest" and the time he called. At some point, Alan decided not to take a 10 o'clock train. A phone call then would have made this whole thing a non-issue.

But, partly, I broke up with him because, after a year, and knowing what silence does to me, he still thought I was breaking up with him because of the drunk dial. He truly didn't get the other aspect of it. Which means, after a year, he truly didn't get me ~ and wasn't going to. And that's MOSTLY why I broke up with him.

And I will miss him. Not just because he did my dishes or because he helped with the trash (although those were always nice) but because he's a nice guy. Nice guys are...well...nice. There are still peaches on my counter that he brought over so I could make a cobbler. He was a good friend. And, at the same time, I need a partner who gets me.

So, I am single again. This time I think I'll stay this way for a little while. Maybe get a dog, maybe not. Whichever way, I'm just going to enjoy being me and with me for a little while. There have been an awful lot of good byes recently. I think I'll spend some time with somebody I won't ever be saying goodbye to. She's really good company.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.