Sunday Poll Question

Several of my exes will tell you I am a self-centered, self-absorbed bitch. And you know what? I'm okay with that label because, odds are good, that if I have that reputation with someone, I have earned that reputation. I'll do the big things for anyone I'm dating ~ that's part of dating. But little, thoughtful, for-no-reason-but-I-love-you things? Not so much. I have to really love someone deeply before I really want to go out of my way for the little things. See? Self-centered, self-absorbed bitch and really okay with that. Otherwise, I'll do my thing, you do your thing and if our things happen to coincide, great! If not, eh...I'm not terribly concerned. While I have loved to do these things for my friends for a very long time, it's also been a very long time since I've wanted to go out of my way to do one of those little, special things for a partner. I do again and it's nice. It's also the Sunday Poll Question.

Question ~ What little thing do you enjoy doing for your significant other? And please note, I didn't use the word partner or spouse. That was intentional. Feel free to define "significant other" any way you choose: partner, best friend, parent, whomever.

Pobble Answer ~ When Lithus is on tour, I regress a bit with my housekeeping (okay, more than a little bit) and go back to living very much like the bachelor I was before we met. You can ask Jaded and the Divine M, as they tend to be the recipients of the groaning "I don't want to clean..." emails the day before Lithus is due home. Because I do clean before he gets home. Still, that's not entirely just for him. For as strong as my slovenly nature is, even I can only live in crack house squalor for so long. Lithus' return is just a good catalyst. Then there is the blanket. Officially, the blanket belongs to both of us, a holiday gift from MomCat. In reality, I have no claim to the blanket at all. It is completely and totally Lithus' blanket and has been since about 20 minutes after we unwrapped the thing. Every night, Lithus wraps himself in this thing cocoon-like. When he's on tour, sometimes I sleep under it, sometimes I don't. The point is, it doesn't get dirty or doggy or anything like that while he's away. Still, the day before he gets home, I make sure his blanket is washed and clean and smelling good. It stays folded and on his dresser that night so that his first night home, he has a clean, fresh blanket to cocoon into. The smile on his face and the sigh as he sinks back into his own bed, on his own pillow...and snuggled down into his own blanket makes it completely wonderful for me as well.

Your answer ~

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Earth Hour

Here's a cool idea: people are turning off their lights tonight (March 29th) from 8:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. local time. One hour. That's all.

According to a Yahoo Green! article by Trystan L. Bass, What difference can an hour make? You'd be surprised -- when 2.2 million residents and 2,100 businesses in Sydney, Australia, all turned off their lights for an hour in 2007, they reduced energy use by 10.2% that day. That's equivalent to taking 48,000 cars off the road.

Well...cool. I can do this. And maybe you can too. At least think about it. Because candlelight is both romantic, for those of you in partnerships, and peaceful, for those of you alone tonight. Neither of those things suck.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Things That Cannot Be Explained, Pt. 1

Over the past ten days or so, I've realized there are some things that cannot be explained. You either get them intuitively or you don't get them at all. Things such as...

* Why "Do you shave your balls?" is a really bad pick-up line. This was an actual line used on Lithus and his crew in Childress, Texas. Now, sweetheart, I understand why you want out of Childress. I understand why you want out so badly you're willing to leave with any man passing through, even one who would respond to aforementioned pick-up line. But sweetheart, it is still a really bad pick-up line. You either get this or you don't.

* Why "Do you shave your balls?" would ever be used as a pick-up line. Poor Lithus and crew were very confused. Sure, some of these guys are small town guys. But they are not Childress-Texas-small small town guys and, honestly, they are guys. At no point were they taught the only and best way to escape from their small towns was on the coattails (or helicopter passenger seat) of someone passing through. So they had no idea how badly they were being outmaneuvered. Or that they weren't men but prey. Big, strapping, meaty prey ~ that would be leaving town in a week or so. You either get this or you don't.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee ~ which is pretty easy to understand.

It's Official

I am now a resident of the state of Washington. Yeah, I was supposed to do it a little sooner, I admit it. First I wanted to make sure this whole living-with-Lithus thing was going to work and I wasn't going to be moving home in a week. But, honestly, a larger part of it was I just wasn't ready to not be a resident of Massachusetts yet. My Mass plates and driver's license were really important. I am, afterall, the Boston Pobble.

Here we are, though. I'm a long way from home yet...I'm here. Officially. And it's good.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Sunday Poll Question

There's a blogswarm this weekend. Depending on who your source of information is, the swarm is either on writing against theocracy or writing about the separation of church and state. (My initial source was Cracker Lilo who has written a beautiful piece on this as well, which I encourage you to check out. You're going to have to go over to my links section there on the left, though, because I seem to have completely lost the ability to link within my post. Technology and I aren't friends. Digressing...) Either way, being me, I went to my beloved ~ if rapidly becoming obsolete ~ Constitution. And here's what I found (as I knew I would): "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free expression thereof..." (God, I love these guys. Such rebels. Digressing...) The First Amendment. Oh yeah, I could write on this. And I'd probably piss off a lot of believers and non-believers at the same time. "...no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free expression thereof..." Good stuff. But then I really got to thinking. What does it mean? And the Sunday Poll Question was born.

Question ~ What does the separation of church and state mean to you?

Pobble Answer ~ First, and easiest, it means I can be Pagan; the Lovely Cats, Jaded and Krystal can be very different Christians; the FE, Nemeria and Webmistress can be Jewish; Lithus and Coffee Girl can be not sure what they believe; and the rest of you can fall wherever the rest of you fall. That's the easy answer.

It also means we all have to put up with each other. We all must be allowed to practice our faith openly, so long as it doesn't infringe on someone else's. And that's where it gets sticky. Over the last few decades, this has come to mean institutionalized atheism. But that's not separation of church and state; it's not "no law respecting...the free expression thereof..." A prayer over the PA system at a school is too much. It shoves that faith down the throats of all the students, not just offers the opportunity for children of that faith to express that faith. A minute of silence? That's perfectly acceptable. It gives everyone a chance to pray ~ or not pray ~ however they choose. No one's beliefs are disregarded. And frankly, more power to anyone who can manage to keep an entire school quiet for one whole minute.

Christmas trees or manager scenes in public, nonsecular places? Fine. That's the free expression of religion. Should there be, in public, nonsecular places, menorahs and Santa Claus as well in order to represent the free expression of other religions and beliefs? Absolutely. Because that's free expression of faith ~ or lack of it ~ as well. Christians don't have the corner on the Winter holidays ~ and neither do atheists.

Separation of church and state isn't about never being exposed to another faith or belief system. It's about being exposed to all of them. It isn't about having leaders who are the "right" kind of Christian. It's about having leaders who have a strong enough moral compass to recognize there is no "wrong" when it comes to religion. It's not about banning the phrase "Merry Christmas." It's about not being offended when someone responds with "Happy Holidays" ... or "Blessed Yule." It's not about fundamentalist Christians fighting for their religion to be the law of the land any more than it is about angry atheists fighting for their lack of religion to be the law of the land.

It's about all religions and beliefs ~ and the free expression thereof ~ having a place. At least to me. What about you?

Your answer ~

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Spring

Today is one of my favorite holidays. That's the thing about being Pagan ~ we get a lot of them. But there is something about Spring that is special to me. The transitional seasons (Spring and Autumn) have always been my favorites, anyway, even before I was Pagan. There is something preparatory, anticipatory, about them. Anything is possible during these times.

Autumn brings a centeredness to my soul that is important, actually vital. But Spring...Spring brings to my soul what it brings to the Earth. A slow budding of potential. Life re-emerging. It is so slow as to be almost imperceptible. Is the grass actually greener than it was this morning? Did that tree have buds on it last night? And yet it is there. And it is powerful beyond measure.

So especially today, I wish you the gentle yet insistent power of the season. May the Spring bring to your soul all it has yearned for during the dark winter. Blessed Be.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

I Wonder If We'll Do It

Barack Obama has done it. He has opened up the discussion of race in an adult, responsible way. He has given us the opportunity to step up, to speak and to listen. He has offered us the chance to take responsibility for our own feelings. He has pointed out the obligation we have to speak and to listen.

I wonder if we'll take him up on it.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Sunday Poll Question

First, let me say a big ol' honking Thank You for the support around the episode. Ain't it nice when something like that is small and manageable? And when you've got people who support you through it? Yeah. It doesn't suck. So...thanks. Now ~ to the real reason you stopped by today...

A man I used to know is dying. How's that for a lovely way to start a Sunday Poll Question? As sad as this is, it has gotten me thinking and reminiscing about that time in my life. We weren't friends but he was a dear, dear friend of a dear, dear friend of mine. Because of this, there is no direct grief on my part (this being said, if you want to keep someone in your thoughts, instead of it being me, let it be Tony and the people who did know him, love him and are affected by this. Seriously, I'm okay out here.) But there is pain for my friend and for Speaker, who was also his friend, along with my smiling, melancholy memories. Which brings me to the Sunday Poll Question...

Question ~ Was there a group of people in your life who inadvertently helped create who you are today? Whose influence you didn't even recognize until years later?

Pobble Answer ~ From about the age of 9 or 10 until I 14 or so, I would go visit the Duck in NYC. Sometimes it was for a long weekend. Sometimes it was for a week or more. But these visits took place several times a year. And during these visits, I met the Duck's friends. This man was one of them. These friends of the Duck's were hugely influential, although at the time, I thought they were just cool adults who treated me like one of them. These people took me to my first cabaret shows, my first drag clubs, my first dive bars. They taught me the importance of sitting around with friends and talking and laughing until the wee hours of the mornings. They taught me to eat dinner at midnight and to have dessert first. They taught me to think deeply, not think at all and to love the moment almost as much as you love the people you are sharing it with. Most of them were starving, unknown artists of some kind or another. These were people I wanted to be. They were interesting, exciting and City. They were a taste of something this small town girl didn't think she could ever truly achieve. I was happy just to hang out on the periphery for a few moments. I have reason to believe most of them wouldn't even remember I was there. Some went on to become well-known and famous. Some went on to work steadily in their fields, even if you wouldn't know their names. Some dropped out of NYC and went on to live very different lives than those they were living during the years that I knew them. It has only been within the last five years or so that I came to realize how influential they were to me. As I have started living the life I have always wanted to live, I have also come to realize it is the life the Duck and her friends modeled for me all those years ago. I have achieved what they gave me glimpses of, what they unwittingly taught me I could be. So. This man and I weren't friends. I knew him for a few moments a very long time ago and nothing more. He was, however, part of a group that taught me more than any of us realized at the time. I will be forever grateful.

Your answer...

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

When I Lost My Mind

Shhhh....here's my secret...I'm in the middle of an episode. It's a very mild one ~ hey, I've gone this long in it and you're just now finding out, right? So mild it is and that's nice. It is, however, here. Right on schedule. When this happens, the best way to describe it is it gets noisy in my head. I am more prone than usual to being overwhelmed to the point of freezing. And there is never any way to tell what is going to be the final thing that I can't manage.

Today, I got new car insurance, dealt with credit card stuff, paid bills, researched getting an emissions test and new driver's license, made arrangements to get said emissions test and driver's license, wrote and submitted the proposal for the next book and handled an editor. I supported Lithus through some crazy-ex-wife stuff, anxiety induced illness in Timber, a background check that has taken a left turn, getting a GAL, finding a counselor for Timber as a prerequisite to getting a GAL and negotiating legalese.

So when did I lose my mind? When it came time to make a hair appointment. I haven't gotten my hair done since I was living with Crow Mother. Folks, that was October. Remember that grey streak I told you about a couple posts ago? Yeah...it's in its full glory. So, it is definitely time. Time because of vanity and time because it makes me happy.

I. Couldn't. Do. It.

Calling around, explaining what I needed, asking for prices, asking who was good with curly hair...too much. I simply froze. The noise got louder and louder until there was nothing but noise. One he realized what was going on, my dear wonderful Lithus wrapped me up and said "We're done for the day. It's time to slow down. I'll do this." And he did.

My appointment is tomorrow at 11:00 a.m.

The noise is very quiet again. It's a very mild episode. I'm a very lucky woman.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Sunday Poll Question

Some interesting conversations have taken place here at House of Pobble the last week. (Well, interesting conversations usually take place here but these specific ones have led to the Sunday Poll Question.) Lots of political talk interwoven with philosophical and moral and ethical dilemmas. Therefore...

Question ~ Is there an action, thought or concept that you are absolutely against...and yet can see the other side of the argument well enough to be grateful you don't have to make the decision about it?

Pobble Answer ~ Physical torture. I am absolutely against it. I find it abhorrent, unconscionable, and believe it is a line that must not be crossed. And yet...as a President or a leader, with the lives and safety of an entire nation on my shoulders... I don't know. The problem is it sometimes works. Sometimes, we get the answers we need. Again, I must reiterate: I Am Against Torture. Personally, I cannot see a situation where I could in good conscious approve of waterboarding. But I can see the other side of the argument. Even if I wish I couldn't. I am aware of the fact that I have the luxury of seeing it in black and white. Because as much as I am against it, if I truly believed what was standing between me and the safety of my Heart or Timber or the Princess Kitten or the Poo was what was in this person's head ... I very well might say get the information at any cost. I don't know. Is that what leaders (not just GWB but all leaders) are faced with, only multiplied by millions of lives? I don't know. And I'm very grateful I'm just little ol' me, the Pobble, out here in the civilian world, where I don't have to make the call and I don't have to know.

Your answer ~ (And please do give an answer, even if you decide to enter into a conversation about torture.)

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Challenge

Get Off My Lawn! has a meme up. (author's note ~ it went up a couple days ago) He left the tag open but told people to take it if they wanted it. He also added that it's harder than it sounds. Which, of course, made me decide I needed to do it because I do love a good challenge.

List five things people here don't know about you.

Hm...I can already tell this one might not see the "publish post" button... But we'll try. With one caveat ~ it can't include the Lovely Cats. If I have to come up with five things the Lovely Cats doesn't know about me, the post will end up being things like what I had for breakfast yesterday and that I am going to the post office today. She knows everything else. Which is comforting and a little scary at the same time. ;)

1. While I learned this past Christmas Eve that I enjoy a roast goose, I also learned that the bones freak me out. The wings are too big for the rest of the body once all the feathers are gone and it's just lying there, on the platter, waiting to become dinner. And the neck bone...Jesus, watching Lithus pull this thing out of the body was like watching a sword being drawn. It just kept coming. All the time, I'm trying to remind myself what geese look like when they are alive and convince myself that this thing on the platter is indeed what it is supposed to look like and it's not some mutant, alien goose with too long limbs. Loved the meat. Next year, I'll skip watching the prep.

2. "The Pobble" is the closest thing to a universal nickname I have ever had. Mind you, I've had a ton of nicknames over the last 38 years but they have all been person or relationship specific. I have been called: by my last name only (the Divine M); by my first initial only (the Lovely Cats and Lrns); Bunk or Bunker; Mame or Auntie Mame; Sister; Bunny; Pooh Lady; O.G.; Charlie; JB; Kyde; Gordo; Harpo; Pinky; Big Pink Cookie; Sheriff; Viv; Chris; and Bing. For the record, no, none of those are up for grabs. ;) However, for someone who has had this many nicknames ~ and whatever else I've been called behind my back ~ I've never had a universal one.

Wow... this is tough. Every time I think oh, I'll write that, I realize I've already mentioned it somewhere here...

3. I am right handed. Growing up, I was always right handed in everything ~ except for throwing a ball. And I could throw a ball pretty well. Until my gym teachers realized I was throwing with my left hand and started making me throw a ball right handed. Now, I can't throw a ball well at all ~ with my right or my left hand.

4. Ferris wheels scare the bejeezus out of me. I can ride anything fast or scary or twisty or turny. And I enjoy slow, leisurely rides. Except for ferris wheels. That moment when the car comes over the top and breaks the arch...I've been known to cry.

One more...need one more...

5. The streak I wear in my hair is based on a real grey streak. All the women in my family have had it. My mother, my sister, both grandmothers and all my great-aunts. There was no escaping this. If anything, mine has filled in later in life than the others ~ and I found my first grey in that area at age 14. Eventually, I want the streak to not be bleached at all, just my natural grey.

Wow. That is tougher than expected. I started writing on this post two days ago. Whew. Let me know if you take it up.

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Time to Share

I write a lot here about family. Some are people I'm related to by blood. Others aren't. There is truly no difference for me. None. It's time to share something...

The very first post I ever wrote was entitled "Whose Family?" It was a list of my family and an explanation as to why there is no difference between biological and chosen family. There weren't many people I'm related to by biology listed in that first post.

Now, were I to rewrite that first post, I would list Lithus ~ who is the answer to every hope and every dream and every whispered wish I ever had ~ and Timber ~ who is everything I never knew I wanted ~ along with all the same people I listed then. And I would add Crow Mother, my beautiful biological sister.

Why she and I got here is irrelevant to anyone but us. How she and I got here is a mystery. Time. Years. Maturity. Forgiveness. Acceptance. It all played a part. What matters, though, is that we got here.

Because of all God's miracles large and small, the most miraculous one of all is the one I thought could never be; God has given you to me...

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.

Sunday Poll Question

It's been a little intense and a lot thinky around Pobble Thoughts this past week. Both in good ways and yet undeniably true. So, I figured we'd take a break from the thinky, even with the Poll Question, and just have a little fun.

Question ~ Who is your obscure crush? Now, I don't mean the obvious ones like Johnny Depp or Angelina Jolie. I don't even mean the ones that are obscure until you mention them and then the majority of people respond with "Oh yeah! I'd forgotten about her/him." Chris Meloni and Mariska Hartigay come to mind in this category. No, I mean the ones that, even once you tell their names, most people respond with "...Really?...Oh...Hm..."











Pobble Answer ~ The easiest one for me would be my number one celebrity crush of all time, Brian Dennehy. But everyone knows about my crush on him so it isn't really fair for me to use him as an answer today. Instead, I will tell you about my most obscure crush. Which is not easy because most of my crushes are obscure (with a few exceptions such as the above mentioned Hartigay and Meloni ~ my God but they're magnificent!) I like people such as William H. Macy and Alan Alda and, of course, the Rush Crush I've got on Geoffery Rush. But my number one obscure crush? He's not going to make it into a top ten list ~ unless it's of obscure crushes. At which point, he's first:

Tim Russert


The man is intelligent (wicked intelligent), has a great smile, integrity and wears a suit well. Yep. I got a crush on Tim Russert.










Your answer ~ Don't leave me hanging here...

Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.