Several of my exes will tell you I am a self-centered, self-absorbed bitch. And you know what? I'm okay with that label because, odds are good, that if I have that reputation with someone, I have earned that reputation. I'll do the big things for anyone I'm dating ~ that's part of dating. But little, thoughtful, for-no-reason-but-I-love-you things? Not so much. I have to really love someone deeply before I really want to go out of my way for the little things. See? Self-centered, self-absorbed bitch and really okay with that. Otherwise, I'll do my thing, you do your thing and if our things happen to coincide, great! If not, eh...I'm not terribly concerned. While I have loved to do these things for my friends for a very long time, it's also been a very long time since I've wanted to go out of my way to do one of those little, special things for a partner. I do again and it's nice. It's also the Sunday Poll Question.
Question ~ What little thing do you enjoy doing for your significant other? And please note, I didn't use the word partner or spouse. That was intentional. Feel free to define "significant other" any way you choose: partner, best friend, parent, whomever.
Pobble Answer ~ When Lithus is on tour, I regress a bit with my housekeeping (okay, more than a little bit) and go back to living very much like the bachelor I was before we met. You can ask Jaded and the Divine M, as they tend to be the recipients of the groaning "I don't want to clean..." emails the day before Lithus is due home. Because I do clean before he gets home. Still, that's not entirely just for him. For as strong as my slovenly nature is, even I can only live in crack house squalor for so long. Lithus' return is just a good catalyst. Then there is the blanket. Officially, the blanket belongs to both of us, a holiday gift from MomCat. In reality, I have no claim to the blanket at all. It is completely and totally Lithus' blanket and has been since about 20 minutes after we unwrapped the thing. Every night, Lithus wraps himself in this thing cocoon-like. When he's on tour, sometimes I sleep under it, sometimes I don't. The point is, it doesn't get dirty or doggy or anything like that while he's away. Still, the day before he gets home, I make sure his blanket is washed and clean and smelling good. It stays folded and on his dresser that night so that his first night home, he has a clean, fresh blanket to cocoon into. The smile on his face and the sigh as he sinks back into his own bed, on his own pillow...and snuggled down into his own blanket makes it completely wonderful for me as well.
Your answer ~
Those are Pobble Thoughts. That and a buck fifty will get you coffee.
18 comments:
Hard to believe I'm first in on this one, but that's a temporary time zone difference.
There is certain dry back that delights in either an appropriate scratch or a volunteered application of lotion.
Sugar and I have been together a long time. There are so many little things, I can barely remember what it was like to not do them. But this morning, Juno woke up early intent on cartoons and cereal. Sugar and I were up til 2am entertaining the RCMP (Risk - I won!) and someone had to get up so the other could sleep in. So here I am, blogging with Dora the explorer talking to a whale in the background, and I have only a few hours of sleep to buffer my sanity against that little punk Dora. Now that I say it, this is no little thing. This is big. Dora is driving me crazy.
i make jambalya for my significant other... it's his favorite. the other thing i do is bread pork chops, which i don't like but he loves.
and i let him watch tv in the bed before we go to sleep. he hardly ever watches what i want to watch so i let him have that time all to himself while i get the kids' stuff ready for the morning.
Appsrus ~ Ah...lovely. There is something very nice about not having to contort oneself in order to reach the dry places.
GOML! ~ As I read this, I thought "Watching Dora would count as a big thing to me..." May I recommend WonderPets?
Lovely Cats ~ I can understand why your jambalaya is his favorite. You've also been known to make chicken and dumplings for another significant other. Which may seem like a little thing ~ but it's not.
"What's going to work? TEAMWORK!" I am indeed fortunate that Juno hasn't fallen in love with that one yet.
GOML! ~ "OHHHHH! This is sewious!" WonderPets makes me cry.
I do a couple of little things that make him happy. He loves his XBox 360. I do not. When he's had a long or difficult day, I just play on my computer or go upstairs to read so he can have some alone time to play his games. Sometimes I'll suprise him with his favorite dinner, which actually changes. He likes a tarragon chicken dish I make, as well as my version of paella, my BBQ brisket and my veggie lasagna. If he mentions something about one of them, I piss and moan about not having time and then make it for him as a surprise. The other thing I do is make a lunch date, or breakfast date with him and take him out. It's easier for lunch 'cause he gets a lunch break. But sometimes I'll ask him to go in late and take him to breakfast, just the two of us. He likes that.
There's a lot of little things I like to do for Brit. I admit I'd do them for anyone that filled the significant other role, because I'm just me being me. I will make him coffee or tea when I get up to make mine in the morning. I like to get him little cards every now and again saying thanks for dinner the other night or what ever, and that I love him. Sometimes I'll even get him a little present like a book about beer brewing or something that I know he's interested in. Cooking too, I'll cook what ever it is he wants (if it's meat I make it work and he really appreciates that) or I'll make my yummy marinade that he loves.
I can think of two: mean back rubs and clean bath tubs. :)
On the nights that I don't have to work the next day (and he isn't working) I stay up into the wee hours of the morning with the pookster. Being as he is on a midnight schedule for work he stays up late at night even when he isn't working.
Clint is a hopeless romantic, and saves every scrap of paper that we write on, every hotel key, dinner menu, or memory. He looooves to find hidden notes and little surprises. So, I write love notes in lipstick on the bathroom mirror. Since he's the breakfast chef, I draw cute faces and love notes on a dozen eggs with a sharpie.
For Christmas, I bought a journal, painted a little something on the cover, and backtracked the last year in pictures and memorabilia. We now trade the thing back and forth, putting in our own notes, photos and comments about our day.
We call it "Volume I"
I like to serve my Bear. I make his plate before the kids' or mine. When his cup is running low, I automatically refill it. He's always telling me that he can get it himself. Many times I'll see him getting up and I'll rush to get him what it is he was going to get for himself.
I also take note of when his beer is running low in the fridge and put more in so it will be cold for him. I'm also pretty good about putting a beer in the freezer to make it ice cold for him before dinner or when he calls to say he's on his way home. I know how he likes his beer cold.
I enjoy serving my husband.
As long as I don't have to iron...
I've been known to buy pickled herring for him. It's disgusting.
I'm not so great at the small stuff anymore. I guess that says alot.
Interesting... I think I'm terribly embarrassed to say that after 10 years, the answer to this is... nothing. We seem to just survive right now, passing each other longingly as the fledglings squawk and lurch around our ankles. Still, in 10 years, I've always made a point to hand Drago his towel before he steps out of the shower. I just asked him if he'd ever noticed that, and he said no, he hadn't. But surely I still get points...?
Hmmm... well, I also try to make a point to leave my frustrations of the day outside when I come home and ask to be a blessing to my family before I walk in the door. That way I can greet a frustrated stay-home-dragon with a kiss and a smile, scoop the fledglings up and snuggle. And I always compliment his cooking (ok, Sister, except for that one time...). I'm not sure he notices any of these things, either. And maybe that's ok. Because then maybe I've done it right.
I'm with you on the general relationship rule of we both have our own things going, and when they overlap it's wonderful, however, sometimes it's just fine to do your own thing.
Anyway, I like your story, and mine would be doing the grocery shopping for the past 2 1/2 years and making sure there is always a surprise treat or two that I know my wife likes and wouldn't necessarily ask for. It's one of the few things that makes grocery shopping bearable. Ha.
Jaded ~ I really love y'all's relationship. Just for the record.
Graziella ~ Cool. ;)
Wolfgrrrl ~ But those are definitely really great two!
Pharmyard ~ That's great. And I know the Pookster appreciates the extra time with you.
GNightGirl ~ Volume 1, huh? Hm... ;)
Krystal ~ That's really nice. And it's nicer that he appreciates it instead of expecting it.
Traci ~ Pickled herring would be a big thing in my book. I can't stand the stuff.
Crow ~ Handing Drago the towel counts. At least, I know I always love it when Lithus does that for me. (Fledglings...*giggle*)
$$ ~ Little things from the store she wouldn't usually ask for...well done. It's simple yet you'd be surprised how many people let this one slip.
There are times when the other is busy doing whatever so it is nice just to get a nuzzle and move on so I don't disturb her flow when writing.
I like to write on a mug for Pobb. Each time something different but hopefully apt.
I like to cook something that Pobb likes alot (a big tray of homemade scratch biscuits).
I don't really do flowers because they are so nice living in the ground ( they haven't done anything to me so we leave each other alone).
I wish that I was a little more green thumbed so that I could give a potted plant. In the past I have come home to a "dear d*&!^%@d" note(with a sizeable list of my failings as a plant care giver) pinned to an empty pot.
Plants are definately out.
Pobb likes to see me dressed up so I do.
It's fun to find things to love Pobb with.
Anonymous ~ *smile* The mug is what I had in mind for your answer, as well. The best part is the little things are indeed things that mean something to me, not just things you think *should* mean something to me.
Post a Comment